The process of Dating for an introvert can be a bit of a challenge, but it doesn’t have to be. In fact, you might find that dating as an introvert can offer several key advantages over your more outgoing counterparts.
In the first place, having a good understanding of yourself and what works for you is going to make it easier for you to find relationships that work for YOU.
Sure, there might be a little bit of a learning curve when you first start dating, but in the end, your unique personality will shine through, and at that point, you shouldn’t have much trouble finding someone to share your heart with. Especially with the help of our relationship advice for introverts!
Let’s go a little deeper into a few tips for introverts who are looking to enjoy many wonderful years with their partner.
Here are some tried-and-true strategies for dating as an introvert!
1. Be honest about your needs
Tell your date you’re not comfortable with large groups and would love if you two could just go on a walk or grab a coffee. Ask for what you need before you need it, and see if your date is up to the challenge. If they are, great! If not, well, at least you tried.
It’s important, to be honest with yourself and your date about your needs. You don’t want to end up in an uncomfortable situation, nor do you want to waste someone’s time if they are looking for something different than what you can offer.
2. Take the lead
If your date isn’t going anywhere or you’re just out to grab coffee with them, take initiative and suggest what you’d like to do next.
Suggest a low-key date like going for a walk or getting tea. This way you’re showing you’re interested and not just prolonging the date with small talk, but instead taking charge of your own evening.
It’s important to take the lead as an introvert during a date. this will give you a better idea of whether or not you would like to further pursue the other person. You don’t have to feel obligated to date, and a smooth move on your part may show your date how interested you are in them.
3. Practice mindfulness
Remind yourself why you’re going out with this person by thinking about all the reasons that attracted you to them in the first place. Keep these reasons at the forefront of your mind- this will help you feel more relaxed and confident instead of anxious and uncomfortable.
It’s important to keep yourself mindful during a date with an extrovert, as it will make you more comfortable throughout the date. If you’re feeling awkward or uptight, it’ll be very easy for your extroverted date to pick up on it.
4. Enjoy the other person’s company- even if you don’t have anything in common
It’s likely you have at least one thing in common with your date, so take advantage of this fact and chat about something besides work or how busy both of you are. Try to find a connection between the two of you, or talk about something that you both love.
It’s important to enjoy your date’s company even if it seems like you don’t have much in common, as this will make the other person feel more comfortable. Even if you’re not extremely excited about what they are saying, try to smile and nod as if you are. This will help the date continue smoothly.
5. In the beginning, don’t talk about your dating history or future plans
In other words, don’t share too much too soon! Introverts tend to think things through before they speak so a big part of successful dating is knowing how much information you want to convey.
It’s best to keep some things secret at the beginning of a date with an extrovert, as some topics may be a buzz kill.
If you both have a lot in common and are on the same page, you can slowly reveal more information about yourself after you feel comfortable with each other.
6. When you’re not feeling it, say so!
It’s a fact that introverts need more time alone than extroverts do. If you feel yourself getting tired, don’t be afraid to call it a night or go home together. It will save both of you from being annoyed at each other later on!
staying when you clearly aren’t enjoying yourself is always a recipe for a disaster date. Just voice your concerns, wish your date the best of luck, and head home. Just because you’re an introvert doesn’t mean that you should feel forced to stay somewhere you don’t want to be!
7. Don’t push yourself too far past your comfort zone
You don’t have to agree to everything someone suggests, especially if you’re uncomfortable with it. If your date wants to stay past closing time at a bar, for example, you can remind them that you have plans in the morning or that you need to wake up early. You can also decline by saying that you’re not feeling well and would like to go home.
While it’s important to be open-minded during a date with an extrovert, you shouldn’t feel obligated to stay out for as long as your date wants to. Just because you’re an introvert doesn’t mean that you should be expected to sit around doing nothing if you aren’t enjoying yourself.
7. Respect their boundaries
Just as you’d one your date to respect your boundaries, you should also respect theirs. If they’re ready to leave and want to call it a night, let them go home without any hassle. Remind yourself that this is their choice, not something that you’ve influenced in any way.
Just as you don’t want your date to try and change you or walk all over you, you shouldn’t do the same to them. You are two different people with different wants and needs- there’s no reason why both of you should try to change the other person.
8. At the end of the day, it’s all about respect
Respect your date and their feelings and they will return the favor. Show them courtesy and consideration and you’ll get this in spades!
Dating is a two-way street so if you’re not getting the same treatment back, something may be wrong.
Just as you should respect your date’s feelings, you should expect them to respect yours as well! If you feel yourself being disrespected or taken advantage of at any point during a date with an extrovert, it’s best to bring this up immediately so that it doesn’t go any further.
Nothing is worse than feeling like you’re not being treated with the same amount of respect and courtesy you’re showing your date.
Your feelings are just as important as theirs- make sure that both of you realize this!
Enjoying your date and having fun is the most important thing! These dating tips for introverts are not meant to be taken too seriously, they are just there to help you out with the specifics. If your date likes you for who you are then that is all that matters! work together to make the best of every date you go on.